Location: Tigereye Peak
Born 3 years, 4 months ago
Species: Fragmented Heart
Color: Shattered Glass Inkmid
Costume: Classic CartoonBuffs:
House: Tigereye Peak House (1/250)
Career (View All)
FH looks stunning!
FH's very special treasures!
My self-representation villager.
Since this Villager is me inserting myself into the world of Furvilla, you'll find that it's going to semi-permanently appear as the active villager for my account when I’m not showcasing another character or paintie. This villager will always be an active worker on my account as well.
!! ALL COMMENTS FROM THIS VILLAGER ARE SPOKEN FROM THE POV OF THE PERSON BEHIND THE COMPUTER SCREEN. !!
Painties by: MoonNue [FV] | odjn [dA] | Mitzbehaven [TH] | xminxicat [TH] | Kiwiggle [FV]
This villager doubles as a villager for both my persona and my IRL self. Because of this, the bio is going to be split into two sections. The first covers the details of the persona, the latter will be the details about yours truly. I can't guarantee a quality description of either, and I have no idea how long or short the sections will be.
Explorer | Cook | Part-Time Minipet Breeder
However, late into his adult life, a careless family member had knocked the pyramid off the shelf where it was displayed not once, but twice, shattering it. The man was devastated, as the pyramid was no longer a common item and could not be easily replaced. Even if it could, a replacement would not have soothed his upset as a new one would not carry the same sentimental significance that the first had. All of the time spent in his collection, all of the memories attached to it, those could not be passed on. He tried to repair the object, to no avail, and in the end it had to be disposed of.
After it was tossed out, carrying the intense feelings of grief and bitterness from its owner with it, the shattered pyramid manifested a malevolent spirit for itself and took on a form of its own. The once-clear liquid that held the colourful beads turned black, seeping out into the air and swirling violently around the shattered item, keeping the resin casing fragments and colourful beads in close proximity. If the pieces and beads drifted too far apart, the spirit would not be able to survive.
Now, it protects itself by manifesting tangible clothing to hide in, and it takes on a varying humanoid shape no matter which form is active at the time. Originally, there was only one form - an object head that mimicked its owner’s interests at the time of its shattering. However, as the spirit continued to exist and grow stronger, it began to shift and evolve into new, more dangerous forms of its own choosing. Some more human than others. Due to its shattered core, the spirit can never perfectly resemble a human. No matter how close it comes, there will always be some sort of glitch or imperfection in the appearance. That glitch is different for each form.
Its destruction was not the fault of the man who owned it; the malevolent spirit acknowledged the years of love and adoration that the man put into the object, and it felt the man's deep grief when he mourned the loss of the cherished pyramid. Despite this, the spirit sees everyone as an enemy, including him, and exists solely to lash out at or hurt anyone or anything it can get its claws on. The spirit is extremely violent, unpredictable, and relentless; once it has set its sights on a target, it won’t stop until that target is completely destroyed. It knows no alliances or friendships, and it has no hesitation or remorse.
Just as I’m terrible at talking about myself, I’m also really terrible at describing my persona. But I’ll try my best to lay this out in a coherent manner.
My self-representation wasn’t always this abstract or bizarre looking. Initially, my self-representation was pretty basic; I’ve had human representations, furry representations, but none of them were things I ever truly felt connected to. They were designs I liked, but they were designs that had no real meaning or association with myself beyond “Oh, that looks cool.” Which, I think, is what really sets this persona apart. Rather than just formulating a design and trying to flesh it out or make it relatable afterwards, this persona evolved over time and was shaped by various aspects of my life. My likes, dislikes, even my experiences throughout the years of my life have all contributed to the final design of my persona. Even the multiple forms it takes on are based on aspects of my life and my being. As well, with past self-representations, they were always characters that “represented” me but weren’t ACTUALLY me. This persona differs in that aspect, as well, because while there are times it’s a separate existence from my own, there are also times when we are fused together into one being.
To be blunt, for lack of a better term, I’m currently calling my persona a “Fragmented Heart.” Yes, there’s a reason for that name just like there’s a reason for the overall appearance. But, as I am still working out the fine details, I won’t really elaborate on that just yet. The biology that makes up my persona is tricky, and because of certain traits, my persona does not have a biological sex or perception of gender. In both forms, my persona is referred to as an “it” because that’s what it reacts favourably to. There are moments when it responds well to masculine pronouns, but it gets vicious when referred to with feminine pronouns.
[The basic Biology]
My persona is not a fully physical being. Despite its humanoid appearance in both forms, there really isn’t anything human about it outside of the clothing and accessories it chooses to wear. The true “body” consists of a core object cloaked by a swirling black mass that looks like a mix between fluid ink and dense fog. The persona gets its name, Fragmented Heart, from that core. As you can probably imagine based on the name, the core is a shattered, broken object whose pieces are contained within the swirling black mass. However, the mass alone is not enough to keep the pieces together, and as the pieces drift further and further apart, the Fragmented Heart will slowly weaken and die. Because of this, clothing or some kind of containing garment is necessary to keep the pieces in close enough proximity to sustain the Fragmented Heart’s life.
The inky body substance is good at mimicking the structure and rigidness of human anatomy, but depending on the Fragmented Heart’s mood, it’s possible that the body will lose the rigidness and become more spaghetti-limbed or take on a more abnormal appearance. Additionally, though the inky substance usually remains hidden within the clothing, there are times when it can splash out or manifest outside of the clothing.
The only true physical objects my persona consists of are the clothing and accessories it wears. Namely, the hoodie, jeans, shoes, and headphones. Anything else is either a holographic projection generated by the core, or a temporary physical shape created by the inky body substance. In my persona’s first form, the TV head is created by the inky substance. In its second form, the eye is a holograph generated by the core. Because the core is broken, the eye cannot consistently stay visible and has moments of glitching, warping, or fading out of visibility. The claws, wings, and tail in the second form are examples of the inky substance manifesting itself outside of the clothing.
When feeling angry or hostile, both forms of my persona have different ways of showing it. In its first form, the TV can break apart or partially disintegrate, with the inky body substance welling up inside and cascading out over the broken glass and casing. The inky substance can reform itself from here for the purpose of attacking, favoured forms being dozens of sharp shards or needles, or multiple hands/arms to grab and tear apart. In the second form, the blade-like claws can change their length and curvature, and are used for slashing, tearing, or scooping. The TV-Head’s aggressive manifestations (needles and hands) are weaker and easier to avoid because they take time to form, unlike the instantaneous manifestation of the second form’s claws. One swing of those claws can rip you in half before you even know what’s happening.
Due to the lack of a physical body or vital organs, my persona cannot speak in a natural manner. Instead, both of its forms have their own means of communication and mood expressions. The TV-head communicates through the TV screen and static, the second form emotes using the eye graphic visible between the ear pieces of the headphones.
Being both a self-representation as well as a separate entity, my persona does not share my personality and likes/dislikes 100%. Even the two forms it takes on have their own unique likes and dislikes that differ from the other. We all like some of the same things, we all hate some of the same things, and either of the forms may like or dislike things separate from myself or the other form. Each form also has a different personality from the other.
To save time and space, I’m going to refrain from typing out each form’s individual personality, likes, and dislikes. That said, if you’re actually curious or interested in learning more, feel free to drop me a PM.
[Here on Furvilla]
The Fragmented Heart has taken up the position of Cook for the troupe of villagers under its watchful gaze, as well as a side interest in breeding minipets every week. It favors simple recipes like soup due to quick cooking time, but if it's not feeling lazy and ingredients are available, it might put forth the effort to make something fancier. Though it can eat its own food, it can't exactly taste anything so it relies on the others to determine whether or not the food tastes good. Luckily, the general feedback has been positive.
"But if it doesn't have a mouth, how does it eat?" you ask. According to one witness, the Fragmented Heart was seen dumping a bowl of freshly made soup and a Baked Furlaska into the neck of its hoodie, wherein the food disappeared and was never seen again.
Don't let it near your Phoenix Fire Hot Wings.
It will eat them all while staring you square in the eye.
It will show no remorse.
[ About Moi ]
Well, if you've read this far, then chances are you're looking to learn more about the individual who runs this account, and the “owner” of the item that became FH. Be warned, I don't really like talking about myself in great detail, so this might not give you the information you're looking for. This is… really just going to be a more fleshed out version of my main profile.
First thing for you to know about me, I guess, is that I am a schediaphile. Some of you won't be familiar with the term, it's the predecessor of "fictophile" or "fictosexual." It's a term to describe someone who has a primary and exclusive attraction to 2D characters. In my case, there are four characters specifically: Art from the Hamatora anime series, Bill Cipher from the Gravity Falls cartoon series, an OC of mine named Belphegor, and… One other that I’m keeping undisclosed for the time being. As seen on my main profile page, Art and Bill are husbando and I ship myself with both in a poly relationship as well as separately for their respective series AUs. Bill and I have an adopted son whom I'm currently working on developing the backstory and such for.
I've gone by many names online, as my username tends to change based on my interests. Currently, I go by Mindscape as a username, or Andy if we're going on a real name basis. My old username was "artswaifu" and I do still go by this rarely, but I am slowly moving away from that name as the "waifu" part is no longer comfortable for me to use for reasons. Associating myself with female terms is just not sitting well with me, and Art’s not the only husbando I have anymore, so the name just no longer fits me.
I have been professionally diagnosed with the following conditions that affect my ability to socialize:
• General Anxiety Disorder
• Social Phobia
• Borderline Personality Disorder
• Persistent Depressive Disorder
• Gender Dysphoria in Adulthood
While I try my best to be social, I struggle. A lot. I misinterpret / misunderstand things a lot, and I have trouble regulating my emotions no matter if they’re positive or negative. If you see me freaking out over something that’s not a big deal, this is why. Just back off if I get heated, let me cool down. I do try hard to keep my feelings bottled up and not trouble other people because of my conditions, but sometimes, I can't avoid a breakdown no matter how hard I fight to keep shit under control. When I get to my breakdown stage, I really just want to be left alone. So if you approach me and I don't respond, or I say I don't really want to talk right now, that's why. I can 101% guarantee you it's nothing personal, and you didn't do anything wrong, it's just that I tend to lash out when I'm in a bad mental state and I don't actually want to hurt anyone. I don’t enjoy hurting people. So again, just give me some space, and I'll come around when I'm ready. I see a therapist for these conditions and I’m on medication, so I’m trying. I really am.
I don't really like putting labels on myself outside of my schediaphile label (and more recently, the teratophile label as well). I'm a human being with his own values, morals, judgements, and feelings when it comes to people, and labels are really just… useless to me. I believe that an individual's actions are exclusive to them as a person. Nothing about a person’s personality is automatically determined by skin colour, race, gender, or job choice. Shitty individuals are going to be shitty no matter what their traits or job are.
I believe in treating people the way I want to be treated, but I am also a believer in "an eye for an eye." If people treat me badly, they will get the same treatment in return.
Fun facts about me:
• I'm ambidextrous, though I am strictly a southpaw for writing and drawing.
• I'll listen to any kind of music except Country.
• I have several medals from clubs and activities I've been a part of.
• I'm good with both Windows and Mac computers.
• I'm certified in Graphic Design and 3D Animation/Video Game Design.
• My favourite colour is silver.
• People often assume I'm a dragon in the Eastern Zodiac, but I'm actually a rabbit.
• I stand at 5'5 and people use me for an armrest.
• I'm a world traveller in the making.
• I can taste the difference between Coca Cola and Pepsi Cola.
• I adore penguins.
I consider myself to be neither a pessimist nor an optimist; I generally tend to look at a situation and predict outcomes that are both positive and negative to prepare for anything. However, at any given moment my words and actions may be more positive or more negative depending on my mood and other circumstances. I do my best to keep a level head and be a calm person but I do have a quick temper that can sometimes escalate out of control. Everyone has their off days, and I’m really, REALLY sorry to anyone who has ended up on the receiving end of my temper because I know it’s not pretty.
I'm willing to try almost anything once, and I'm somewhat of a thrill-seeker. I love amusement parks with fast and/or high rides!
[Things I like, and things I'm not so fond of]
• Drawing / Writing
• Movies / Cinema
• Game shows (Jeopardy, Wheel of Fortune, Let’s Make a Deal, Family Feud, etc.)
• Spring & Fall seasons
• Cyberpunk, Solarpunk, and Steampunk aesthetics
• Urban environments
• Wind Turbines
• Gemstones and rocks
• Coin collecting
• Plushie collecting
• Fire alarms
• Mushrooms, Bananas, Strawberries, Starfruit
• Math and Physics
• Summer & Winter Seasons
• Being in a hospital
• Cliche romance
• Chick flicks
[Onto more serious matters…]
I'm not a well-liked person on this site. A lot of it stems from miscommunication and telephone games, where people have twisted things out of context, the rest of it comes from my opinions and beliefs. I’ve been blocked by a slew of people on this site, too many to count at this point. Additionally, if you're seen socializing or being friendly with me, those people might also come to block you too so be prepared for that. Guilty by association, or something. Apparently people who get along live in an echo chamber and it’s impossible to be civil or even be friends with someone whose opinions might differ from yours, even though that’s a thing that normal people do every day.
That said, I know why I'm not well liked on this site. Part of it has already been mentioned above, and part of it is what you're about to read (if you're still with me at this point). It's regrettable, but there's also nothing I can do about it.
I'm not a person who goes out of their way to be friendly to people just for the sake of it. As previously mentioned, I can be civil; If you're nice to me I'll return the kindness. If you're an asshole, expect me to be the same. I'm here for the pets and the villages, not the community. I'm done with trying to change myself just to please people, I’ve grown tired of it after 19 years of being in online communities. If people can't like me for who I am, without asking me to change myself, then they're not worth getting to know to be honest. If I manage to make friends, great. If I make enemies, I really couldn't care less anymore.
If you ask for my opinion on something, you need to be prepared for the reality that you might not like what I say to you. I tell things how I see them; I've been told I'm a bit too blunt at times but that's because I don't see a point in sugar coating anything. If you put your work out for other people to look at, you need to be prepared to accept criticism and negative opinions. You don't get a gold star or medal just because you tried. Not everyone is or can be a winner. That's the reality of life.
Another thing that makes me unpopular is that I am not a person who will coddle and shelter other people to avoid hurting their feelings. Now, that doesn’t mean I’m encouraging the idea or the mentality of straight up being an asshole to someone for no reason, because I don’t work like that. There’s a big difference between actual, helpful constructive criticism and just saying, “you’re a failure, stop trying.” That said, feelings getting hurt is a very natural part of life and it’s unavoidable. It's how we learn and grow as human beings. Encountering differing opinions, things we hate or detest, or things we are uncomfortable with is also a natural part of life, and people need to learn that running away or hiding isn't the answer. You cannot run and hide forever, and the more you try, the worse the reaction will be when you finally have to come to terms with things. I know it can be scary or stressful, but even baby steps is better than nothing. Running and hiding, blocking out anything that makes you even remotely uncomfortable or challenges your views, creates a toxic environment.
Safe spaces don't really exist. They never have, they never will. There will be instances in life where the block feature doesn't exist or can't be used. There will be instances where you can't just walk away or close yourself off. Get used to it. I fully encourage people to step out of their comfort zones and expose themselves to things they dislike. Exposure for the sake of building tolerance is a wonderful thing, and I say that from my own experiences.
Yet another thing that makes me unpopular is that I'm transgender. Transmale, working on transitioning after years of struggling to get the help and recognition I needed to start down this path. I do not support "transtrenders" or people who call themselves "non-dysphoric trans." I've been getting professional medical help in regards to my transgenderism, and so far, every professional has said that yes, dysphoria IS required to be transgender. And yes, I believe/trust that. If you do not experience dysphoria at all, you are not transgender. If you do not experience body/gender dysphoria, you really have no reason to CALL yourself transgender. No, I’m not talking about the people who are unsure. I know that people don’t immediately know what they identify as, hell, even I didn’t immediately realize I was trans until I reached adulthood. If a person is questioning whether or not they’re trans, I support them. If, after a time of experimenting, they realize transgender isn’t what they are, then that’s okay! There’s nothing wrong with that.
When I say “transtrender” or “non-dysphoric trans,” I’m referring to a group of people who deem transgenderism as a choice, and constantly activate or deactivate the label when it’s convenient for them. Often times, these people harm the trans community by invading trans spaces and telling people to just “love themselves.” (It’s not that easy, trust me.) These people do not experience gender dysphoria at all (100% comfortable with biological sex + corresponding pronouns), and they get aggressive towards people with dysphoria or people who are trying to transition, considering such acts as “brainwashing” and “privilege.” They’re very toxic people to be around and they certainly do not help our cause.
Additionally, while the internet nowadays says otherwise, “transgender” is not a "catch-all" term for anything other than cisgender, nor is “transgender” its own gender category. Trans people are still male or female. Transgenderism is when your perceived gender is the opposite of your biological sex, meaning a trans male identifies as male while having a female body. A trans woman identifies as female while having a male body. Identifying as the opposite gender, missing the biological parts that your brain perceives you as having, is what causes the gender dysphoria. It’s that simple. As well, Non-binary people are not transgender. Non-binary is its own category. This is backed up by the medical professionals I have been seeing offline, and where many of them have been in transgender fields of study longer than I’ve been alive, I trust them.
The final thing, the thing I think is what really makes me unpopular with the userbase on this site, is the fact that I am personally incapable of validating or using made-up genders, which are something you see often on this site.
The pronouns I CAN use for people are as follows:
• It/Its (Though this feels odd to use in regards to another living being.)
Additionally, while I am okay with the concept of animal-based otherkin and have several friends who identify as such, I absolutely do not (and will not ever) support the concept of fictionkin or factkin, as coping mechanisms or otherwise, because they are highly unhealthy and damaging; not to mention just plain disrespectful and outright creepy as hell.
Fullbody artwork: Mitzbehaven @ toyhou.se | Base Profile CSS: Cro | FH Bookmark: Darci @ deviantArt
✮ if you find me wandering, please return me to myself (29913). ✮