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Villager: Mateo



Villager Info

ID: #396646

Name: Mateo

Gender: Male

Location: Oceandome

Born 5 months, 9 days ago

Career: None

Owner: Pikabolt

Species: Raptor

Color: Chibi Undead Vulture


House: Oceandome House (250/250)

Career (View All)


Mateo is infected with Zombipathy. Eating brains relieves symptoms for a time, but comes with memories of the brain's former life. Your doctor recommends adding hot sauce for extra flavor, but a Golden Apple a day will send the Zombipathy away.

Mateo looks stunning!

Mateo's very special treasures!


Name: Mateo
Age: 155 (??? at time of death)
Career: Graveyard Watch
Favorite Color(s): sunset colors
Likes: picnics, crocheting, giving gifts, playing with magical materials to crochet with, experimenting with said materials, and telling jokes
Dislikes: demons, destruction of property, ripping yarn mid-crochet, loosing his crocheting needles, and failing in his duty
Favorite Food: Slime Slushie and Pawpurroni Pizza
Hated Food: Mustache Munchies
Other: Carnivore, Toyhouse

Visiting the relatively small island cemetery, you do a double-take at the sight of a vulture sitting perched on one of the two gravestones. As he looks up to meet your gaze, you realize that he's not just any vulture - he's an undead one, skin and feathers having sloughed off in some parts, leaving nothing but gleaming bone exposed.

"Hello. I haven't seen you visit the cemetery before. You're a visitor, right? Then be careful around these graves; treat them with respect, and I won't have to rip your eyes out."

"My name is Mateo, and I am the grim of this graveyard."

This statement bewilders you; isn't Xino the resident church grim here? There's no way this undead raptor can be the same - church grims are only dogs, and you tell him as much.

"Hahahahaha! That's true, for the most part. Occasionally, a sheep or a pig minipet will be used, but it's almost always dogs. For church grims, at any rate. Those aren't the only kind of grim out there."

"What am I talking about? Why, the graveyard watch of course!"

'You don't know what that is? For shame! Let me educate you, then."

"The very first person buried in a graveyard takes up the Graveyard Watch; they are bound to the cemetery, making sure to protect the graves of those interred there from any who would defile them. Even if that person is the devil himself. It is also our duty to escort the newly dead to the afterlife, so they do not get lost and wander as ghosts in the land. Evidently the grims of Xino, Ephemera, and Morgan's world clearly failed to do their jobs, given that they're here and not in the afterlife where they belong."

Mateo grumbles something under his breath, which you can rightly assume is something uncomplimentary about said grims. You take the opportunity to ask if Mateo plans on sending them there himself.

"What?! No, I'm not going to kill them! However it happened, they're back among the living now, and we grims don't just kill people! Not unless they're a threat to our graveyards! I mean, sheesh!"

The vulture shakes his head incredulously.

"Anyway. To avoid a person being subjected to that fate, a minipet is sacrificed in their stead, and buried in the graveyard. And since they are the first, they become the cemetery's guardian; a grim. As this is usually done for church cemeteries, they are called church grims."

"Now, Xino is a rather special exception. I've never in my life - or unlife, really - heard of someone being reborn as a church grim before. Talking it over with the 'reincarnates', the general consensus seems to be that their personalities influenced what they returned as. If that is the case, then Xino must have been a very loyal and protective friend indeed. Something that hasn't changed in this life."

"How old was I when I died? I dunno, I've been dead long enough that I've forgotten. My cemetery wasn't attached to a church, and while there was a watchtower of some sort it's not exactly like it was maintained when the place was abandoned. Nor did it have any clocks on the outside."

"How am I here then if my graveyard lies elsewhere? Well, that's the thing."

Mateo gives you a sobering look.

"I failed in my first watch."

"A powerful demon prince - not lord like Belphegor, I mean a prince of the netherworld, made some sort of a deal with a mortal. What is it, I don't know, but it involved giving him the power to banish me from the graveyard."

"Normally, killing a grim does nothing, and we will reform in a few hours within our cemeteries. But this demon had found a workaround; destroying this place as a graveyard. If the grounds I was bound to were gone, then I would be released from my Watch, and move on to the afterlife."

"I fought. Oh, you bet I fought. With the fury of a thousand suns, I made sure to bleed them for every inch of ground they defiled with their presence. They sealed me within a crystal, and without me to defend the grounds, they were free to raze them to the ground."

Mateo visibly droops, clearly still hurting from this.

"I failed. I could only watch, silenced, as they made off with some sort of treasure hidden in the watchtower. Some artifact I never knew was there until it was gone. What none of us realized was that being sealed in the crystal kept me from fading as I should have, and when the thing was sold off to a pirate, I ended up here."

"Wha- oh no, it wasn't Southpaw. It was someone else, but as for who it was, I have no idea."

"Anyway, it was Xino who realized something wasn't right with my prison. Like calls to like, and he felt a kindred spirit inside. After many attempts to release me, including failing to shatter my physical prison, it was suggested that it be buried within the cemetery. Grasping at straws, I know, but by then they were desperate. And miracle of miracles, it worked."

"As I was already a grim, I slid easily into my place here. And here I've lived ever since."

"What? The dove?"

Mateo turns to look at the bleeding heart dove, before returning his attention to you.

"A dear friend from my first graveyard. Amaranth has been my companion for untold ages. As soon as I was unsealed, she flew all the way over here to reunite with me again."

"Hmm? What happened to the first person who was buried here? Well, this was before Caspian's father was buried here. The villagers had set aside the land as a graveyard, but it hadn't yet seen use. As such, it accepted me as its guardian readily enough. And so now I live here, in a populated village with people who visit me, and not just the graveyard. It's quite a nice change of pace. I would still swap this for preventing the destruction of my old grounds, don't get me wrong, but as far as things ended up going, it...this is really nice."

"Haha, of course I have hobbies! You didn't think us grims simply sat around all day waiting for mourners, funerals, or intruders, did you?"

"Anyway, I crochet. Don't give me that look, crocheted garments are actually quite nice. There's something special about making something with your own two talons, and there is never not a use for crocheted clothing. Well, unless you live someplace like here, but it does still get cold in the winters. Not enough to snow, normally, but we do have a spirit of winter living here full time. So yes, we get snow. And even if we didn't, you can't go wrong with some crocheted sweaters and blankets, or even knitted ones like Primrose does. Though he prefers accessories and blankets over clothing..."

"At any rate, you can even imbue special properties into the things, depending on the materials you use. Usually the wool is treated and enchanted by alchemists and then made into yarn by tailors, but you can get wool that has a power all of its own from natural sources. Where do you think the Golden Fleece came from?"

"I've been meaning to ask Morgan if he'd be willing to donate some of his wool...he might look like half his fur is falling out if shaved, but it would be for a worthy cause. I mean, what kind of power would the wool of the dead reborn to life hold? Would it be akin to phoenix birb ashes, or..."

Mateo trails off, muttering under his breath. You've answered all your questions for the time being, so you decide to tell the grim goodbye.

"Right, sorry. It was a pleasure meeting you; I hope you have a long and fruitful life."

"Take care, traveler."

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