Wardrobe

Villager: Zatarin Ezigark

Lexi stepped into the house and nodded, laughing. "I doubt I'd answer to it, honestly. Nobody I know is actually named Harold." He nodded after a few moments, stepping out of Zatarin's way once inside, closing the door after him. "I'm fairly sure, yeah. I think it changes every decade or so, I can't seem to keep on top of it." Lexi raised an eyebrow at the black, but it didn't really seem to bother him.

"My kids would love your place. And then I'd be after them, offering to clean the chalk off of the walls." Lexi said, finally following after Zatarin.
"I used to forget things, but so long as I write important things down, seems I only forget minor things. Like where I put my keys." The badger patted his pocket, as if to make sure they were still there.
"Well. I mean. Sometimes someone has taken my keys and replaced them with their soldier man toy, or the television remote... Kids are great, but they can be really sneaky."

"Hunter's my eight-year old stepson. Kid can get a straight answer out of anyone with enough needling... I figure Killi didn't feel like talking to adults - children were probably his safest bet for venting." Lexi shrugged, before sighing quietly. He shifted after a moment, before laughing.
"My neighbor can't remember anything either. I think she called me Harold the other day." The badger laughed, before smiling sheepishly. "Lexi."

He hummed again at the suggestion, canting his head to one side. "I hate to say this, but I think maybe you were the first person he considered capable of being something of a friend. Killi spent most of his life training to be unseen and unheard. Now he's honor-bound to stay in town and devote himself to serving the people. I don't claim to know what he thinks, but you seem edgy enough to attract his platonic interest... er. No offense."

He bit back a laugh at the banter before shrugging. "I wouldn't mind. It's a bit cold out here. It'd be nice to warm up. That being said... I really don't think I'd taste too good."

If he was bothered by the strange critters opening the door, he didn't show it. He'd seen a thing or two in his time after all. He kept a neutral expression and minded his own business in regards to the house. He wasn't here to judge, after all...

"Evening, Zatarin." Lexi hummed, smiling. The badger looked up, to meet the saggitauri's gaze.
"I'm really sorry to bug you - it's just that. Well, something really odd happened at my place an hour or so ago - Killian came over, refused to say why. He looked a little upset, but I can't for the life of me get him to talk about it. My son, Hunter, said that he thought the pair of you had a fight." Lexi paused and rubbed the back of his neck thoughtfully.
"Now, I'm not here to start anything - I'd just like to know what happened. Killian's a bit new to the whole inter-personal interaction thing, and, to be honest, I have to explain a lot of things to him because he doesn't understand. If he's going to work with people, or even be around folks, you know, he's gotta learn that not everything is a negative thing... are ya with me so far?"

There's a soft knock on Zatarin's door, and outside Lexi stood, a map in his paws and a cellphone uncomfortably pinched between his shoulder and the space on the side of his head.
"Are you sure? No, no. I didn't ask for directions... folks here don't seem too friendly 'round this place." He paused, clearly talking to someone.
"I'm fine, don't worry. Yeah, hopefully before the boys go to bed. Yes, I'll be careful. It'll be fine.... I love you too. I can do that, yeah. Alright. Bye." He carefully folded the map and put his cellphone away.

"Alright, let's see what exactly happened..."

The buck bounded away at the roar, a streak of blue off into the evening. The biggest 'nope' to ever have noped, as it were.

Killian carefully began placing the pamphlets into the trashcan wordlessly, listening to Zatarin continue to speak.
"Watashi wa anata ga ima hanasu no o yameru koto o negatte imasu." He hummed, eventually, before turning.
"My name is Killian. Yours is Zatarin. I put the sword in your mailbox because I asked someone where you live to find you, after you left it for me to find as a threat. I chose not to take it as such, because I didn't feel like it." The buck folded his arms across his chest and raised an eyebrow.
"I had already apologized for that. Perhaps you forgot that as well, hmm? While I do admit that I am not the most socially adept creature on the planet, I cannot easily answer all of your strange questions, though I do make an attempt."

"I think you are perhaps cursed with something besides memory issues. However it seems I am damned to only be remembered by you for one thing, for always and eternity. Good day, Zatarin." The buck turned sharply and headed off. Well then!

"I forgive you, it was an accident." Killian replied, fidgeting slightly. "Ah, well. You are brightly colored - like cotton candy is. I am not good at coming up with insults." He huffed out a laugh, before pausing.

"Many people have mailboxes. Is that not where pamphlets go?" He'd gone absolutely everywhere that day.
"Ah, well. I won't do it again. I'd rather not have Lexi getting at me for. I'm not sure. Solicitation, perhaps?" He waved away the words as he continued picking them up. "It's fine. It seems you've gone and picked all of them up for me, hopefully I don't get myself in any more trouble." He paused, hands full.
"The litter comment was a joke. Are we not doing those anymore?" The buck seemed confused at the way the conversation was going, the mirth eventually leaving his face altogether.
"I do not mind picking them up myself. As for the smoking, if the smoke could be contained and kept away from others, I wouldn't mind it so much. But as it stands, it's not very fun to be enjoying an evening walk, and suddenly not be able to breathe." His ears twitched slightly and he gathered the last of the pamphlets.
"I am not qualified to help, as I am not a medical doctor. Hence, the pamphlets. Help openly offered can be accepted by anyone. Would you rather I personally escorted you to the clinic and explained how to apply? Because I believe that would be considered harassment." He took a deep breath, before raising his head.
"If you cared about yourself, you would stop on your own. If you cared about others you would pay more attention to where you smoked." The buck turned then, heading for a nearby trash can.

"It's a figure of speech you gothic piece of cotton candy!" Killian laughed, shaking his head. "And mind yourself. I am a delight." The buck hummed as Zatarin continued to laugh, slowly raising an eyebrow. The smug little smile on his face never once leaving.
He taps his chin as the saggitauri continues to talk, and then asks him if he's being real. "I've been told that I am a poor lair - though I believe we were having banter?" That seems to stump the buck for a few moments, and he focuses on a nearby patch of grass awkwardly. Suddenly pamphlets are raining, drawing his attention back to... almost being sliced in half.

The buck had leapt back in time to avoid it, sliding a bit on a pamphlet. He wobbled - but didn't fall.
"Hm? I've been posting those all over. I apologize if it appeared that I had been monitoring your wherabouts... you are aware that more people than just you smoke, yes? And that those pamphlets could also be used by them?" Killian giggled, once more covering his mouth with his hooves. He gestured to the sword.
"It's fine, it's fine. I should have made a sheath for that, before returning it to you... anyways. My reflexes are impeccable." He bent down and started to gather up the pamphlets.
"You really need to stop littering, though... I mean, paper isn't that bad - but it does make everything look messy. And it's slippery..."

"Ah, I was surprised. I didn't actually want to hit you... that time." Killian sighed. "Sometimes despite all my training, I still have moments where I slip. Fortunately I caught myself." He was fairly sure he was on casual speaking terms with Zatarin, after all. The buck shrugged and slung his staff across his back carefully. "A very strange way of being helpful. Perhaps he knows I haven't gotten a good look?" Killian smiled wryly, shrugging.

He laughed, wiggling his hooves at Zatarin. "I can't write very well, as you can imagine - holding a pencil and filling out forms is torture." The buck's amusement grew as Zatarin began to ramble once more. "I would of course, secure your own personal wellbeing, before escorting you to the hospital. Even though that'd be even more paperwork." Killian blinked. "A park ranger? Perhaps one day, if the position becomes avalible. As it stands I am what amounts to a keeper of the peace, or a junior officer." He paused. "If I recall correctly, a park is simply publicly owned property that... uhh... hm. I'm sure it's typically where people gather, and has it's own rules... that sort of thing. It had to be explained to me as well." The buck canted his head. "Are you certain you are well?"

"Perhaps that has already happened. It's my tragic backstory." Killian grinned, pausing. "Ah, this is just one of several I own. If it breaks, I have spares." He paused for a moment, the branch really was heavier than he'd initially expected... and then suddenly Zatarin was being swalowed by the ground. Killian hopped back, startled by what had just happened. He almost smacked Zatarin in the face with his staff as he reappeared.
"... You should thank your. Friend. I don't know if we would have been able to get you out from beneath the branch." Killian smoothed the fur on the back of his neck down once more, laughing quietly. "No, no I didn't break anything. A little warning next time would be appreciated though. For a moment I thought a sinkhole had appeared. The paperwork to file for closing the park would have been a nightmare." The buck paused before regaining a more serious composure. "And you? You may be a bit bruised, but you don't need a doctor, yes?"