Wardrobe

Villager: Fred

A little guy who likes vegetables and grows his own on his grandpappy's farm in Hoboken. Do not underestimate his boundless might and superior intellect. Fred can beat any scrub in a game of foosball while riding a blindfold and wearing a unicycle. One time, he even saved a whole orphanage from a fire, rebuilt the facility, then got all children adopted all before his dinner got cold. Think I'm lying? He will drop kick you in the teeth if you so much as call his bluff. Fred never bluffs. He graduated all of the colleges so you know he is a true believer. Fred was so respected for his perfect posture that his professors begged him to teach ergonomics. He has devoted many labor intensive hours teaching students across the land and as thanks for all his glorious work he got a street named after him in Ye Old Tappan.
How do people write stuff without losing focus? Seriously I'm just spewing out whatever letters my brain is telling me to write at this point and its getting more and more nonsensical. This train of thought has derailed and the conductor is dancing on the caboose. The parrot is no more it has ceased to be. Invest in gold. Do you or a love one have mesothelioma you may be entitled to a brand new car at 6 easy payments of 9.99. Floss twice daily and I swear if you start dancing so freakin help me I will boil your kneecaps.
I wonder if cabbits were real, would they chase mice or would they leave carrots in their owners shoes? Would they be cat sized or rabbit sized? It is one of the many mysteries of life; much like the logic of this needlessly unhinged profile description why would anyone read this.